Ironic Truths and Oxymorons

1.  Common sense is not so common anymore.

2.  Lowfat sugar free dairy free gluten free Chocolate Cream Pie.

3.  Tolerance only means you tolerate the intolerant, who don't tolerate you.

4.  Public Schools are locked, all of the time, therefore, not open to the public.  Just sayin'.

5.  Teenage wisdom .... only they know they're right.  Shhhh.... don't tell 'em.

6.  Life's little mysteries should remain as such.

7.  Christ died for my sin, yet I keep sinning....what's up with that?

8.  God forgives me when I sin .... Thank God!

9.   When life gives me lemons, I bitch about it, because I don't like lemonade.  Go figure.

10.  Life is NOT a bowl of cherries, but yet a bucket full of crap mostly.  You must learn to make compost in order to make something grow.

11.  Gay, not-so-gay, waiters at that restaurant, you know who you are, are just lying so they can look down your shirt without getting bitch slapped.  He doesn't have the foggiest idea of what jeans you need, girl, he just wants to see your booty!  lol!

12.  I love my love/hate relationship with my life.  Odd.  I know.  I love the people, I hate the dishes and the laundry.

13.  In my suffering, I will find joy, the ultimate joy of my God, my Lord and Savior, who will be with me at all times.  Joy, in my suffering.