Do the overbite dance!!!!

Yes, B-9, like k-9, but not. Benign, be happy, be joyous, be at peace, be still and know that He is God, be, be, be, be......be.................................................be.

I know something you don't know.

Yes, it's a great day. Today I realized that my knowledge superceeds that of my 16 and a half year old son. Yes, I know you are all jealous. So to answer the perplexing question in your mind....I taught him how to roll start a truck. My teaching is now done. I feel as though his education is complete.....

Better than a poke in the neck with a sharp needle!

Do you remember the last time you went to a concert and when you left your ears were ringing with that nothing noise? Or the last time you went roller blading, or like me, roller skating when your feet still felt like the skates were on after you finished? Isn't it odd how our bodies compensate for our actions?

I did neither of those activities, but had the same feeling yesterday. I woke up feeling like my feet could take me anywhere, anywhere but where I was, skating from one task to the next and talking my mother's ear off when she arrived. This led to her question, "Are ya nervous?" in that tone of voice only a mother has when she knows something that you don't even know about yourself. The further into the day it went my ears started to tune out the noise around me and became this abyss of white noise blaring in my eardrums. I stayed calm and collected.

I arrived at the doc and was escorted in fairly quickly. Great! The one day I brought something to occupy myself (my crocheting) and I get in quick! I decided that the rumbling in my gut was not my lunch, but was the flutter of those annoying insects that only show up to fly at 100 miles an hour through the entrails when you're the most nervous.

I love this dr.! She loved my shoes, I talked her into trying a tall, skinny, cinnamon dolce latte at Starbucks and she is so stinkin' funny with her very dry medical school bed-side manner. Several needlesticks (5 if you include the numbing medication) later and some time alone with my hubby in the room the doc confirms that she has enough "stuff" to send to the pathology lab. Thank goodness, because another needlestick probing would not be fun, I think the novacaine had worn off at this time. So... now....we.....wait................. Because of the holiday next week there is no telling if it will get done before then so it may be the next week until the results are back.

Thanksgiving will definitely be a time for reflection and thanks. Thanks for the blessings of my family and friends who are feverishly praying for us. Thanks to God for the blessings in my life. Thanks for the opportunity to exercise the patience I have been praying for.

Now, that's done, nothing more to do in that area but wait, so I guess I will do my laundry. Wow, I love laundry.......well, I do now. I will take dirty, stinkin' teenage boy socks!

I'm so two faced!!!

I am such a two-faced person when it comes to those "how are you" questions. Only my closest friends and family even really want to hear that answer if we're really honest about ourselves. There are others that you have to know well enough that you have to give them your upbeat positive answer because they within themselves cannot handle the negative, not even a hint of negativity. It's like it throws off their emotional equilibrium and they can't function. So, I have those I speak candidly to and those I speak superficially to based on their reactions so that I don't stress them out and tip them over. Now that you're all lost in a literary lego pile......

Tomorrow is the biopsy. A lump on my neck that is a cyst within my thyroid. It's like someone has their thumb in the base of my throat and each day is different. Somedays its pushing a little harder than others. My thyroid is perfectly normal in operation no overactivity no underactivity, just foreign objects floating around in it. This is soooo common. Nodules, or cysts are found in lots of people and lots of people have them in their thyroid. 90% of the time they are benign. But I have enjoyed living my life thus far as an outsider looking in on "those" "they" "them" that have these common (?) anomelies, which is how it was ironically described. Anyway, I am not worried about the outcome, either way it goes I'm good. I give glory to God for my life and my blessings. This is a blessing, I know that. I may not know how just yet, or ever, because it might not be for me to know, but I know that I am blessed. I don't like the idea of cancer being active in my body. Apparently, we all have those dormant cells that can become cancerous in our bodies, but I'd rather not have mine come out of hibernation.

I am asking for those readers who dare to do so, to pray. Pray that the outcome is benign and this is a one time thing. Pray that our finances will be blessed so that we can pay the wonderful people who are using their God given gifts at this time in my life. Pray that my kids will remain in God's presence no matter what happens. Pray for my life to continue to be blessed and for my ability to handle the blessings no matter what the package looks like. Pray that God will get the glory throughout this whole process.

Sing along if you know this one:
"My life is in you Lord, my strength is in you Lord, my hope is in you Lord, in you, it's in you,
I'll praise you with all of my heart, I'll praise you with all of my mind,
with all of my mind, with all of my strength, all my hope is in you"

And for today:
Philippians 4:13
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."

An Excellent Day!!!!!!

I love my kids. Shocker, I know! We had a really great day Friday and I thought I would share the proof. We headed off to Inner Peaks the indoor wonder of Charlotte with thousands of square feet of indoor climbing extravaganza! Don't get me wrong, it wasn't just the place that was great, 'cause it really wasn't. It was the whole experience with the kids and their honesty spewing from their innocent lips!

Miss Lyss was insistent that "french fries ARE good for you, 'cause her mommy told her so and she tells the truf!" So in the defense of the healthy lifestyle, Miss Liz gave up the argument. Her philosophy? Why argue? There is no winning side to an argument with a 4 year olds beliefs in a root vegetable cooked to a soggy state in what some like to call liquified animal fat. Anyway, there was hunger, feet stompin', rock climbin', belly laughin', people droppin', boulderin', melt-downin', trader joe-in' fun!

Miss Sims even gave us a lesson in seat belt safety and chimed in on the fact that her mom was "gonna get a ticket from the po po!" Which led to a frantic police watchin' the whole way to trader's!

The lesson that we learned on Friday is that life is great! Life is fabulous! If you take the time to emmerse yourself in the life around you and glean those great moments into your brain. A cerebral memory flash drive to open up later and relish those times God gave you. I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. They didn't think it was quite so funny, though.

My favorite moment: As Liz and I were belaying those cute little bodies up the rock wall she turned to me and said, "Do you get that feeling, you know the 'Coolest Mom" feeling right now? Think what some others are doing right at this moment and what we are doing right now!" You know what.....we are VERY COOL MOMS!

Tower of Terror!!!

I have decided that I would just put all the talk to rest. Yes, all of those rumors that lurk around every corner of society. Those rumors that have for so long defined those of us who work from home. The ones that start like this: "oh, you're a stay at home mom, how lucky you are, I wish I could do that." "Wow, you must get so much done working from home!" "You have so much more time to be on the computer, because you are at home all day." This used to cause the lava from the core of my being to erupt into a tirade of job applications filled out just to see if I'm still a viable member of society. Those days have passed.

You see I run my own business from home and my computer and I am a "stay at home work all freakin' day long with no monetary return on the dirty laundry kind of mom", unless someone forgot to empty the change from their pocket, then I count that as my compensation! Anyway, it's such a glamorous life! From the mystery animal that has metamorphosed in the corner of the room from an unknown dust and hair source to those mystery stains in the laundry to the ever popular toilet scrubbing, hair in the drain removing, lunch inventing, and oh yea, I better not ignore my actual paying job in the office. Glam, that's all me. I don't get mad when people assume that I do nothing. I do however wonder what my house would actually look like if I do absolutely nothing. This week I feel as though I am being swallowed up by Gap, Old Navy, Walmart, Target 100% cotton, polyblend, lycra, spandex and denim mound of material I like to call "The Tower of Terror!" Clothing factories across the globe are operating at full speed because of my family. 5 children, a hard working husband and myself all contribute to the TofT. The only good thing I have found about this is that as long as its on the floor it keeps the dust off of that portion of the house and therefore cuts down on my sweeping. I do what I can. I tried flylady but inadvertently let off the flea bomb in my house and she met the unfortunate maker somewhere in the chaos. JK! We had friends over last night....the dad went upstairs to get his daughter....I was mortified that he saw my laundry TofT in the upstairs hallway....I am doing laundry today.

In all things find blessings and thanksgivings! I thank God everyday that I am at home with my kids. I thank God for the ability to be able to wash clothes indoors and not risk being eaten by an alligator while beating my capris on a rock on the bank of the Zambezi River. I thank God everyday that I have food to stick to the plates of my life. I thank God everyday that I have a roof over my head to keep all of my ....uhm....stuff in. I thank God everyday that my children sleep safe and sound in a place where God is, where the Holy Spirit lingers, where in every corner of my house has God residue stuck to the walls, to the furniture, to the doors, to the stuff. I need less stuff so I can see and smell and touch where God is in my home. Thank you God for me being here, in this place, at this time for these people, for your Kingdom. Thank you for residing in my heart.

So I Went...

To the Dr. that is. The endocrinologist. OOOOOOO....big word alert! Just a consultation however. She did determine that it is a single cyst and will be biopsied on the 19th. She is very positive and totally cool!
Anyway, my point of this blog is to say...I am now a tree hugger! Why? Because there is too much paper work to fill out at the dr. office that made me come to the conclusion that my medical records have taken down a forest somewhere and there are little creatures homeless wandering the barren land now looking for a new home! What I find so funny are the questions and the information you fill out on each sheet that tend to make me wonder if its just a ploy to get you to not realize how long you've been sitting in the waiting area. You don't notice that you've been delayed because you're still filling out your address for the 15th time on the 15th sheet of unrecycled paper. There must be a better way! I'm beginning to see where the rising cost of health care is coming from.....office supplies.
Not to worry, I did my own little test to see if anyone really reads this stuff. You see one of the sheets is the get-to-know-ya sheet. How many kids? What are their names? Ages? How far away do you live? How long is your drive to the dr? Then the ever dreaded questions. You know the ones. The rude ones that ask, "are you eating healthy" or "when do you excercise" or "what form of excercise" or "how many times a day do you excercise" or "length of excercise". I decided....ENOUGH OF THE MADNESS! So, here is what I said....
How often do you excercise.......All day
When do you excercise.......All day
Length of excercise.......All day
Type of excercise.....Kegal
Needless to say, noone asked me about my excercise routine we just skipped right over that one! That'll teach em!
Don't you judge me! If you've had children, you know how important it is! If you've had 5 children you know how IMPORTANT it is!
Have a blessed day!
Love to all!
God Bless Every Breath!

Joy Personified

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Wednesday Highlights!

This mutha was in my face today as we were cleaning out the flower beds for wintering over, so I decided that I would wait to cut down anymore flowers. Very, very big dude or dudette. It's a writing spider my daughter says. I'm not sure if I care......










Yes, I did it! I ate the whole thing all by myself, salt and all and it was so good! Sad, but true! Again, not sure if I care!



So, that's my day, in a nutshell! I wish I had read Liz's post, she had pie and wanted to share with coffee! I hope there's some left. My life is so.....quiet....(nice way of saying boring). TYG! Happy Wednesday!

Blessed and Grateful

I am grateful to be a daughter of Jesus Christ, Almighty God and the Holy Spirit himself!
I am grateful to be an american!
I am grateful to be the wife of a Godly man who loves me bunches!
I am grateful to be the mother to the coolest children on the earth!
I am grateful to be an un/life/homeschooler!
I am grateful to be a friend to my bestest buddies, Liz and Beth!
I am grateful to be a woman!
I am grateful to be a Dumford daughter, thanks to Carl and Jan!
I am grateful to be a sister to my bros and sis!
I am grateful of my life as chaotic and wild and unpredictable as it is.
I am grateful of my past, my present and my future.
I am grateful for food in my fridge, cause scraping the frost off of the freezer walls to make a slushie does not convince my kids, nor does it taste great!
I am grateful to be in a country where I can say "Praise God" and not be arrested!
I am grateful for the fall leaves and the magnificent colors.
I am grateful for gas in my gas tank.
I am grateful.....I am grateful.

Fear and Trembling

Isn't it funny (funny, odd, not funny, ha, ha) how fear RULES our world? "What If" the stock market falls, he crashes on his bike, the wind picks up, it snows while we're here, my heart gets broken, I'm rejected.....I have cancer. What if....what if.....what.....if......Fear plays a huge part in how we move, live, speak, play, love. I've tried to be a parent who embraces all...I try not to pass on my reluctancy in certain situations to my kids. I do not want them to have a fear brought on by me. Fear of heights, fear of rejection, etc. There are definitely lots of creepy, crawly things that show up in my life that I must embrace and encourage the curiosity and learn more about them. God created all things. My new mantra.
I wrenched my back a week or so ago and wake up every day in slow motion. Not for sharp needles of pain, but for the constant dull chronic pain of an injury that I still have no idea what it is....therefore fear of having the pain so intense again. I then received some news from the doc that this foreign object in my neck will need to be biopsied. The dreaded word...biopsy. Bringing all sorts of conotations to mind as to the definition of the lump. All research is completely positive as to the statistical outcome of said lump. But as for all statistics, by definition there is a percentage to the contrary. That is what I do not want to focus on. I am trying to remain realistic and smart, but not allowing negativity into my thoughts, if that even makes sense to those reading this. I do not live an organic, nontoxic lifestyle...in other words I live outside the bubble. So I am perfectly aware of the odds I have placed on my health to go either way. Fear, hmmm, is it playing a part? Of course it is. It's like getting on a roller coaster and then being absolutely terrified of the ride until you stop. White nuckled, holding on, looking around to see when I vomit who will bear the brunt of my lunch, trying to tame the swarm of fireflies taking flight in my belly and toes. My coaster car is click, click, clicking slowly, agonizingly up the chain, the fear mounting as we reach the top knowing that it will be a wild ride once the horizon is fully visible. I'm not scared of the big "C", I am fearful of the situation I have placed my family and friends in. Fear comes from the unknown, ignorance, complete denial, etc. I plan on smartin' up on the whole thing and trying to be well versed in my life. What a concept. I read recently that if we constantly compare ourselves to our old past lives wishing things would stay the same we will be asking ourselves to do the impossible, but if we look at where we are in our lives today by celebrating the accomplishments along the way. "Look how far we've come since last year!" Not what if I have cancer, but look at where I am in my life now to handle this little detail! God knows what he's doing without consulting me, thank goodness for all of you!
There is no fear in the kingdom mentality! It's not about me, or you, or our fears. It is about getting busy doing the work for the kingdom that God has commanded and doing it every moment of every day. Thank you God for the gift of suffering, so that I may cherish those times of no suffering even more. Read Matthew 28 and know that He is with you ALWAYS!

What the World needs now, is ______ sweet_____!

You know you're singing that song, it's now stuck in your head. I'm sure you've filled in the blanks already with the appropriate word. "LOVE". SWEET LOVE.

My family and I have the distinct pleasure in being on the same planet as a wonderful missionary, Debbie. I have known Debbie all of my life. Her mom and mine were college roommates and my big sis, Mel, and Deb were the same age and have shared a kindred spirit all of their lives as wonderful friends. Although our families did not live in close proximity, we lived close in our hearts.

Debbie is a wonderful woman and a gracious one. She would not approve of my high accolades in what she does and how she lives her life, but I'm givin' 'em anyway because she is an inspiration to me. You see, Debbie is a missionary with AIM in Kenya. You may say, ok, I know some of those, great people.... and? Well, Debbie has been a missionary since she graduated college. She has been in Africa for 20+ years. Her first teaching gig was in the Congo. As some of you may keep up with African history, the Congo has not been the most peaceful place to live. She evacuated under some tense situations there in the past, not to belittle by leaving it at that, but I cannot do the story justice trying to explain the adrenaline rush one must get by fleeing. She has also been in villages close to Nairobi when she once again had to evacuate quickly. She keeps her candle burning in Africa. She is home when she is in Africa.

I questioned her about her decision at such a young age to become a missionary to Africa, a country she had never visited. Debbie knew at that time that God was calling her for mission work in a country where she could use her French speaking skills. She followed that calling and all resources and heartbeats led her to Africa.

I had to know for me, what impressed upon her not to retreat to the states after two times of fleeing areas she called home? Debbie recalls a time when she first lived in Africa and visited a couple who were missionaries, interpreters. Although she did not know when they had time to be interpreters because they had people knocking on their doors all hours of the day and night seeking help, refuge, comfort, etc. These interpreters spent their time serving, not some, not a few, not this one or that, but all of those people. Debbie remembers lovingly, and tearfully thinking, "I want to live here long enough to love the people of Africa THAT much!" WOW! What a testimony. What an embarkment into the Kingdom mentality so many of us long to know, to experience just once, but for some it's a Kingdom lifestyle. I want to live on this earth long enough to LOVE people THAT much. Thank you Deb, you are a blessing to all of the lives you touch. God Bless you and His mission for you! I LOVE YA!

My Funny Valentine

Wow, reading back over some of my posts is quite depressing! So here goes..... an upbeat post! I know it's a shocker!

This past weekend I had the pleasure of attending one of the premier arts events in the Birkdale area. I know, some of you now feel so left out! My brother, AJ, had some of his awesome photography up for auction to raise money for a business in the area that deals in fair trade items from all over the world. Anyway, it was quite successful and there were other vendors and entertainers there as well for the cause. Check out his photos here


As the jazz band started playing "My Funny Valentine" my mother said "I have to go get your father, we need to dance!" Sooooo funny! She's still so in love with him and visa versa. Get a room! They danced for a few minutes and mom's knees couldn't take it through the whole song, so I got to stand in for her and dance with my dad. How awesome is that?! After a struggle with who's exactly leading this one and few twirls we were done. I had forgotten how much I missed dancing with my dad. I remember when I was little standing on his feet and wrapping my arm around him and dancing around the room with an occasional twirl and a dip that would end up in laughing hysterically! I love Memory Lane, it's my favorite street!

SPIT IT OUT!! NOW!! Love, God

Why do I act the way I do? I am completely passionate about everything and I hate that! Because I feel that way about everything I find that when things don't go my way I get ANGRY! I'm quite the loud mouth anyway so you can imagine where the anger spews from.

I am a complete and utter mess. So I have gotten the royal spanking of my adult life this week and now am in the proverbial time out chair sulking in my own temper tantrum residue, yes with the lip out and everything!

In trying to decipher what comes next for me I find myself lost. I think because my "self" is apparently not at all a viable member of society. I have failed in 98% of the areas in my life, i.e. wife, mother, friend, Christian, person, and the list goes on.... So in reflection of my staunch discipline I have decided to look at things in my life that need changing. First of all, my anger vomit. The ole literature rich technicolor yawn! Porcelain throne mouth! That's me apparently and I need to do something about it.

Anger, what is it? Here's one definition: a strong emotion; a feeling that is oriented toward some real or supposed grievance. I believe mine is regarding the latter, the supposed grievance. You see, if I get upset or angry it's only a mysterious hormonal event by most and is completely invalid, therefore I am wrong in being angry. So, what does that mean? I know the sin isn't in the anger it is in what you do with that anger. Shutting things out of my life - sin. Dealing with anger by avoidance - sin. It means that I must choose not to get angry, at anyone, ever again. I obviously cannot be angry without sin, so anger must go. SPIT IT OUT!!! Pbth! Pbth! Patooy!

I have swallowed my pride so often this week that I am to the point of having a serious lump in my throat and I fear it's philosophically cancerous. It may spread to my heart and harden it altogether. If that happens will my blood then run cold? Not sure..... I do know however that what I am to work on is keeping it from coming out of my mouth and splattering on the cold tile floor and up the walls of my life. There is no way on God's green earth to clean up that mess once it's there. I need an anger antacid.

I am seriously going to change, with God's help and guidance. I am confused however at what that is, how to achieve it and just how long it may take. I have felt that up to this point God and I have had a pretty good relationship in communication only to find out it was only my imagination, so I don't know anymore when I'm hearing Him if it's really Him or just some two-horned, long-tailed creature disguising his voice. I DO know I have to be in the Word daily and follow my own advice and take time for myself for that personal reflection with God. I'm sure the answer lies there. I don't want to be angry. I don't want to hurt people's feelings. I don't want to be a bad Christian. I want to be a loving caring person to everyone. I want to learn to keep my mouth shut (super glue may help). I want to be good. I want to be who God wants me to be.

Stop the Madness!

I have come to realize in this day and age that lying has become the norm in our society. Quite shocking and extremely hard to live a "real" life in the midst of it.

When we got our cat the previous owners told us all about him. "Merlin, does not like his food without the bowl being on the food mat, he loves baths, he doesn't like people much, very skiddish, likes to actually say the word "hello" in the morning, hates it when the vacuum cleaner is on (so do I), etc." We found out after much love and affection that Merlin, the world's most awesome cat, loves people (sometimes too much), eats whatever, whenever, wherever, but doesn't like to be alone when he eats, HATES with a passion baths (duh, he's a cat), doesn't give a rat's behind about the vacuum cleaner (bummer, I thought we were kindred spirits on that one), and last but not least, to everyone's shock and amazement, he cannot say the word "hello". However, he can talk "meow", an ancient feline language only understood by humans under the age of 10.

Here's another example. Upon an invitation to a birthday gathering a 17 year old confirmed that he would be attending, but in a different conversation with the maternal unit of said teen it was relayed to me that she would have to reconfirm in private whether or not said teen actually wanted to attend, because this maternal unit's children often lie to people and then in private tell mom and dad they don't wanna. Sure, I'm comfortable with that...........I could've gone a long time without knowing that one. Is ignorance lying? Now I'm never sure when we're around each other whether anyone wants to be there or not.

The best one I can think of to date is a story my dad loves to tell about my oldest brother and a little friend of his when they were probably 4 or 5 years old. My dad was going to take them out for lunch and when he picked up this little girl from her house, her mother proceeded to tell him how she didn't eat certain foods, i.e. hamburgers, fries, etc. OK then, off to Mickey D's they went anyway to pick up lunch. When ordering he turned to the little one and asked her what she would like to eat for lunch. She said very confidently, "A cheeseburger happy meal." Dad inquired, very confused, "but your mommy said you didn't like to eat those things." To which she replied, "sometimes I fool my mommy!"

Why is it that we find it so hard to be honest? What makes it ok to teach our kids to keep the truth from others? I find it so hard to decipher whether or not people are being honest or just being "nice" by not telling the truth. Like that's gonna help. In this season of political banter, congressional sized untruths, corporate coverups, mistrust in the market, I think it's time we call for a change in ourselves to be more honest with one another. There is a reason why we don't trust anyone from Wall street to Pennsylvania Ave. to Hometown Road. It starts at home.

I am just really pleading for my own sanity here. I do not like to be surprised after a "real" fake conversation that it was all just a ruse. Be Real. Please Be Real. It's ok to have faults. Celebrate your personality, like it's your own....duh. God made us the way we are for reason. You were made to fit snuggly into another's life journey at different times and different seasons. You're messing with the Big Guys plans when you hide yourself and the truth. Don't hide from that for fear of hurting feelings, rejection, or heartache. Be yourself, your beautiful, wonderful, odd, quirky, ever-so-perfectly created by God self. And for goodness sakes, if those pants DO make my butt look big please tell me!!!

The Hat

Oh my goodness, I have found another obsession to fill my spare minutes (ha!). Check it out, though! Sarah and I (shhh! and Matthew) have taken on crocheting this week. Quite fun to make something with your own two hands. Whether you fashion a necklace and bracelet for all of the important people in your life (Jake) (shhh! or you make an ever-so-masculine bracelet) or a hat. I am so proud of this hat! I started last night and finished this a.m. I think I slept, but I may have dreamed of things like fptr on the ch-1 sp, rep rem st, then * around...just trying to decipher the pattern terminology was a challenge enough, but now I feel as though I have mastered a new foreign language! Whoo Hoo! Those of you in the inner circle expect handmade articles for Christmas, i.e. clothing for you and your coffee cups and extra t.p. rolls! Make sure I know your favorite color, I'd hate for you to get something you'd never use. LOL! Stay tune for the sequels to the hat..... the mittens and the scarf!

Extraordinary Recipe Blog - CuisineNie

Check it out! Very good stuff!
Click here for recipes, vegetarian and such!
Our day meals:
WholeWheat Spaghetti for lunch - quite scrumptious!
Dinner was Mexican Lasagna - awesome choice! with Peanut Butter Cookies for Dessert! YUMMY!

Excellence

I love my two bestest girlfriends, they are the best! We have been in discussion over the past week and a half about excellence. A hard to define state of living. What I have come to understand in my life is that excellence is a very abstract word. It's like trying to describe love, or hate, or what blue tastes like! Everyone has their own opinion of what they think excellence is or is not. Some fear that wanting excellence is wanting perfection, I beg to differ. Excellence is defined as that by which any one excels or is eminent: a virtue. That definition is still a vague representation of the word. In God's word we are called to bring our all in our worship, reverence, homes, work, parenting, etc. Although wonderful concept I find myself questioning my ability to do so. I so desperately want to bring my excellence, my best, not perfection by any means, but my all in all that I do.
I have had a lesson in humility this week as I have thought about what I do bring to the table. I have no room to talk about wanting others to strive for excellence if I am not willing to do it to the fullest myself! I want to be there, though. I have a dear friend who recently wrote a bible study for our retreat where Shalom is defined as the kind of peace that results from being a whole person in right relationship to God and to one's fellow man. Whew! No wonder I am not at peace right now. But that is what I long for..... Shalom. I desire to experience that. I know that comes with excellence in attitude, wanting to only give your best to all, especially the Good Lord above!
Lord, I give thanks to you today for the friends you have so graciously and gently placed in my life. As I strive for excellence and peace within your will I ask that you continue to watch over me and my family. I thank you for the blessings upon blessings to bestow to us every day we're waken by the sunshine. Lord, bless those that are reading this and place your hand upon them today and everyday. Help them to know that I love them. In Jesus Christ, AMEN!!!

I can smell orange.....

Can you? It's coming and it's in the air. The most beautiful time of the year for me is autumn. The time of year when the Aspen trees quake with a whole new sound of a clapping audience instead of the ever subtle quake in the summer. The time when the sun denies the leaves and they turn colors that seem more radiant than the year before. Colors man has not been able to quite imitate at the chip selector at your favorite paint place! Butternut soup, broiled acorn squash, roasted pumpkin seeds, the smell of sunshine on the clothesline, the crisp breeze through the drapes. I can smell the orange color in the air. The color scarecrows long for. The color of my soul inside. The quiet, lingering, rich, burnt orange. I hope I don't forget the orange when the light blue aroma of summer returns. Indian corn, hay bales, stattice flowers and the streams of sunlight in the window....autumn.

The Shack Part B

I cannot adequately express to you how much this book has affected my life, but I will try. I am not an avid reader, but when a book comes along this good I can't put it down 'til I'm done. A beautiful story of one man's journey through the dark recesses of his heart. Some call it heresy and by definition I cannot refute that. Heresy is a religious word by it's own meaning and this book is anything but religious. In my search and quest for real relationships I find this book to be a top 10 how-to love your neighbor. Although some believe its content is too way out there, too weird a concept to consider, I find it a refreshing look into one man's view of his internal eternity. We all have that vivid picture of what it will look like, what God will say, what Christ will do, etc. It's fascinating to watch it come to life within the ink on the page. Until we're there and can see for ourselves there is no way to know what heaven or hell (for some) will look like. I thank Willie for giving his account of Mack's vision in such an awesome descriptive hike through a grieving father's cerebral wilderness. My advice to all readers is READ THIS BOOK! Whether you hate it or love it, talk about it. For no other reason than to raise awareness of differing views and how we can be more aware of the world around us outside our own "shacks" and LOVE like never before!

The Shack

I will continue to edit or add more to this blog as I go, I'm sure of it. I have just devoured one of the best books I have ever read. Albeit, I haven't read a whole lot, but this one is devine! I must insist that you give it a try and be transformed.

Why NOT to have a Yard Sale!

The following was an email that I sent to my friends (girl-friends) back when we were dumb enough to plan the ultimate multi-family yard sale! I hope you enjoy it as much as we did!


OK, so I am only writing to you girls because some of this content my not be suited for others, but AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!! Yard sales, where do I begin? It's really a twelve step process like AA, and it goes like this:
1. Admit you have a problem
2. Crawl into every oriphus of your home and drag out every item covered in dust, older than dirt, something you would not even consider giving to your children and put a price tag on it.
3. Cry
4. Sweat
5. Bitch and Moan
6. Procrastinate
7. Hold your breath
8. Clean everything off, wash it, dry it, polish it like you love it!
9. Look at it and ponder,"How much would I pay for this?" Oh, yea, I already fell for that once.....
10. Find a box to organize each item into certain catagories, i.e. crap, old crap, crap I still like, and c....r.....a.....p
11. Put out a sign directing people to your crap
12. Sell your crap and take your profits of $11.50 and splurge on a new...................pack of gum.
Was it worth it? Heck yea!

I started early this morning with pleading and prayer with God. Please dear Lord make me want to do this (kinda like my laundry prayer). Then I walked for the first time in months, not procrastination but exercise!!! Then I dove in head first. Great, you say, way to go, you add, awesome...... Here's my dilemma: When I dove in I forgot to remove my exercise clothing of which contained a sports bra... Now you may wonder why this is a big deal. Remember our ac is off. O - F - F, off. So I realize I'm like the proverbial frog in cool water this a.m. that has during the day been turned up unbeknownst to me. Now I am sweating so hard and dripping that the tape I'm using for pricing won't stick! Which I think has to do with the friggin' humidity index in my house as well. I'm working so hard that I don't realize that within my tshirt a chemical reaction is happening so severe, so scary, so horrible that only when I contemplate taking a shower do I then have a fear like no other......... HOW THE *&%% DO I GET THIS @#&** THING OFF WITHOUT PUTTING MY SHOULDER OUT OR WORSE ... STRANGLING MYSELF!!!!!!!

WHAT THE.....?

Don't you just love the phrases our little ones pick up on? The question has never been finished by anyone in my house, (that I have heard) but whenever my daughter used to say this I always feared the last word may make it in there and didn't know which it would be. I love her! I want to be her. She's nine, btw, and going on 30. She is sooo much dang fun. Never a dull moment. Never a quiet one either. She has soooo much stuff in her brain that spills out on a regular basis through her vocal chords. It's amazing the stuff she knows! It's intimidating trying to teach her, hoping I'm not dumbing her down! LOL! She will read her assignments and before I get the first question out she is giving me the answer and so much more! Go, Sarah girl! She doesn't like dresses, she rarely goes for a brush without being told, she loves being outside, she loves creepy, crawley, slimy, leggy, freaky things, her imagination runs wild to the xtreme, she LOVES her friends, she LOVES her jake the snake, she is the most awesome woman, girl, female, tomboy, human, person, living creature I know. Do you know how big the giant squids babies are? She does. Do you know how many baby snakes a corn snake can have? She does. Do you know what a gyre is? She does. How about a thermoharline (sp?)? She does. Can you spell oviparous? She can. Do you know how to find joy in all you do? She does. Do you know when your friends/family are in need of a hug? She does. Do you know how to cry with them? She does. Do you know how to pray on the spot for anything? She does. Do you know what your oldest brother's favorite ice cream is? She does. Do you know how to change the lives of 4 teenage boys, 2 grownups and the world around you? SHE DOES, without even trying. I love my Sarah, my little katydid! My life is so "freakin' awesome" (as she would say) because she blesses our family.

M.W.D.D.

My new syndrome....Mother With Depression Denial. You see, I don't believe in depression. I believe in just picking yourself up and moving on. I am in denial that it even exists. Don't get mad at me, it's just my insensitive way to make me feel better about myself. I do it all the time. Which has led me to the conclusion that that is why people no longer like to be around me. Me, fun-loving, out-going, funny, beautiful, love to talk, me. I have made myself completely unapproachable for most people. Of course, my hubby and my kids have to love me and at least ask me "have you seen my shoes?" Sometimes that is the only conversation I get during the day and it has become quite an exciting moment knowing that the conversation is coming about where in the world shoes have gone in my house. The really unfortunate thing is that in denial that depression is a real thing I have found myself completely and utterly depressed. Not on the outside. I have that female motherhood syndrome of depression where only you and the good Lord above know that you are depressed, because to let the rest of the world in on your weakness and fears and rejections would be the downfall of my ever-so-not-so-perfect world. My life is great. My kids are a blessing to me everyday. My husband is a saint! But on the inside I am totally in a puddle of tears and trembling in an imaginary fetal position in my imaginary corner of my mind. Just smile and say hello and tell everyone you're fine and dandy and life is great, because it is.....hmmmmm, the dynamics of that are interesting. I know that I am to find joy in everything. God has placed that on my heart. I don't know what Joy is to me anymore. Maybe it's not my definition of joy, but His. You know, the big man upstairs. I have joined flylady.com and would recommend that to every woman who is out-going, full of clutter, artistic and out of her mind with busyness. I would not recommend it for anyone who has it together, already clean and neat and organized, sweet tempermented all the time, etc. To those ladies it would be a horrific look into the other realm of women. Flylady nails my personality right on the head and gives great advice. I am hoping that becoming more organized will help me pick my inner self up from the bootstraps and get over myself and my hidden depression, which if you ask me I will tell you I don't have. God Bless all of those overworked, overwhelmed, overweight, overcluttered, overdepressed (shhhh, don't tell) mothers of the world today and everyday!

Excited!

Why? Could it be that rain has finally fallen on our ever thirsty ground? Or maybe that the invention of a front loading washing machine that holds 16 pairs of jeans is what makes the world spin for me? How about the fact that kids are back in school? Maybe the ever increasing frustration and agitation that my 13 yr old has for me for making him read, OMG, a book for his homeschool assignment therefore making my life complete that I have once again made his life miserable! While all of this seems like enough to make one woman, and mom a happy one, it's none of those. I know the suspense is killing you.....
A few weeks ago I attended one of the most eloquent cinematic phenomena of all time. It's depth and perception of the female psyche was uncanny and touched me in a way no film of my time has dared to do. What made it even better is that I got to spend my time abosrbing this great film with the two coolest chicks ever! A girls' night that provided laughter and fun like you wouldn't believe. Yes, it was Mama Mia with Elizabeth and Beth and I uncontrollably rolling in the floor! So why am I so excited? I have just heard that this Friday the opening of the Sing-A-Long version of Mama Mia is coming to theatres near you! You have got to be kidding me! Elizabeth knows all of the words and Beth and I are trying hard to get there, Alyssa (Beth's DD) knows the words! She's 4. A multi-generational masterpiece! Girls....I'm feeling the pull. Put it in the budget, we're going! Pack your kleenex and your depends, it's gonna be a night out! I have included the original video for you to practice. I'm feeling a wardrobe requirement!

My Best Friend

<<<< MyBFF (left) and the most
handsome river guide ever (right)!





Let me tell you a little secret....I have a best friend. Some may say, "What's so secret about that, don't we all?" Well my little secret is that my best friend rarely knows it. "Why," you ask? We'll get to that in a bit. My best friend has known me the longest, loved me the most, put up with my %$^&* and still stays by my side. My BF calls me by my name, keeps me sane, places hands around my shoulders even when I push away constantly. My BF loved me enough to create with me the most beautiful children on God's green earth. He harbors jealousy in his heart for me always for the time we spend apart, the time we're together, but not "together", for the things that separate us every day. But my BF prays for me daily, kisses me softly, hugs me gently, waits patiently for my hormonal temper tantrums to subside. He thanks God for me.....why, I will never understand. He loves his sons like no other father I know. He gives thems life tools that they use everyday. He loves his daughter like she is the only snake princess on the planet. He tells her she is beautiful every single day of her life, and she knows she is! He provides for me even in my time of haphazard spending sprees. He loves me. He loves God so much more than his love for me, which is why he loves me so unconditionally. I do not deserve him, I don't treat him like my BF, but he knows he is, I know he is. I don't tell him enough how much he is appreciated by me. I don't say enough "I love you" in a tone of voice that is respectful of a BF and my husband. I rarely show him the love I feel for him and for noone else. I am the worst BF ever! He loves me anyway. Who else could you give the look to, walk away from, shrug your shoulders at, cry with, love all night, breathe through childbirth, and smile with when your children graduate, but your BF. David knows me inside and out and for some really demented reason still loves me! Thank you God for my best earthly friend! Thank you God for my soul mate. Thank you God for my husband and the father of my children! Thank you God! My prayer today is that all who dare to read this have or want to have that BF and that they have the courage to say to them, "I love you!"

The Boys' Are Back In Town....

As I am sure most of you are aware how your children are precious gifts given to us by our one and only Father God. I am aware of this and his protection, but my motherly instincts kick in every once and a blue moon (everyday) when I feel as though they need an extra protection from me as well. It's hard to do when they are away, so very far away, in Mexico..... Mission trip.... Why did I agree to let them go there? Why did I think that would be a good idea? Again, God is in control of it all! I was worried through the week of whether they got enough to drink, eat, if they were too hot, yadda, yadda, yadda. Again, God's protection not mine.... They both faired fine and are changed men because of their experiences this past week. As we get just bits and pieces for now since its just too early to tell all or remember all or find the courage to find the words to talk about things.... My one son, John, tells me it was wonderful. "So simple" he says. "I could go back" he says. His heart is so open to service and people and laughter and fun and finding maturity in that is a hard road right now as a teenager, but he is doing so very well at it. I could learn from him, as I do daily. Adam, my oldest, what a man... What a goof ball! But he's been so very quiet since he returned home. He's in a studious mood, almost humbled. Hopefully he didn't drive everyone crazy on the trip, especially the 20+ hours down and 20+ hours back in the van, altogether, close and personal, etc. Sometimes when I wonder what in the world is he thinking... he surprises me with his intuitive thoughts about the world and the way it looks from inside his beautiful skull. What awesome opportunities God has given me to hang out with two of the five most coolest, wonderful humans, my kids, on the planet. Thank you God!!!! I am truly a blessed mother, wife and friend! Thank You!

My boys, John (left) and Adam (right) with another beautiful person in my life I am privileged to know and love! Not in Mexico, but the most recent photo I have of them together!

Ebay Unpredictability - Who Knew!

As I am writing this I have just completed my daily shipping chores for my ebay stuff. I LOVE to sell stuff and get it out of my house. I think I have a twisted purpose in doing so. I believe I like to have that positive feedback to make my day. I know, it's sick! I am moving to a much more mature reasoning for having this ebay obsession....money, or my lack of it. I enjoy watching things leave my house and go to all parts of the world. Vladimir from Slovakia emailed me the other day about some pins I had for sale. Extremely broken English, so cool! He unfortunately couldn't buy the pins he wanted because of some restriction, so my pins went to Cary, NC .... oooo, how exotic a place is that?!@# Anyway, it's such a small world and a crazy one at that! I can list my limited edition, low numbered, worth tons of money disney pins and get .99 a piece for them and then I can list a pin made by the toyota company that they gave out for free to their car buyers and sell it for $13.00. What is up with that? People are so funny about their emotional purchases when it comes to that. I think they get caught up in the last minute bidding war. I can just hear it in my head...."mine, no its mine, mine, no mine" just like toddlers fighting over toys. Silly, really. When it comes right down to it, none of it really matters anyway. You can't take it with you. But it is helping me make some much needed dough, so bid all you want. You never know when you'll need that butt ugly leg lamp from The Christmas Story movie!
Check it out! http://www.redriderleglamps.com/productDetails.cfm?merchID=2&showDescription=yes You can also purchase this lamp with a free nightlight! Wow, what have I been missing out on?

Then you can always peruse through Sarah's Backyard, my ebay store to see what else you thought you didn't need, but now realize you can't live without!
http://stores.ebay.com/Sarahs-Backyard_W0QQsspagenameZMEQ3aFQ3aSTQQtZkm

Summer Fun!

Awesome day! Dani, Jake and Sarah had a blast you can tell by the circles under their eyes as they try to keep them open a little longer. A trip to the park to try out the new equipment. Rock climbing....yes! Says Sarah! One day as she dangles off some cliff somewhere I'm sure I'll get a little picture mail with the view! She climbs like a girl, too! (Which is better than a boy, BTW!) My little spider monkey! Anyway enjoy the views of our day as we rounded it out with a trip to Birkdale fountain for a little water time! The day isn't done til you have been soaking wet! Summertime motto.

Sarah, lovin' life!

Go Dani, go!

Jake, suckin' it in for the camera!

Sims, what a bathing beauty!

Cicada Songs and Cool Breezes

So, sitting on the front porch listening to the Cicadas and letting the breeze blow by is one of my favorite things to do. I love my porch.......I really love my porch! When we built this house this was one of my wishes on the wish list and I got it. It has entertained famous people (mostly my friends that are famous to me) and has provided sunshine and a much needed napping spot for my cat. It has seen tears of laughter and pain, heard songs of praise, prayers in desperation, pitter patter of little feet, raindrops blowing in, thunder clapping in the distance, and the constant creaking of my porch swing. It provides a haven for visitors to come sit under the ceiling fans and escape the heat. Many a conversation has been struck on this porch, many an idea of world peace, many recipe exchanges, many bible studies, lots of bible reading, but most of all it is a place of complete solitude with the man upstairs when the Cicadas are singing and the breeze is blowing.........................